Not MY life-story

As I lived by the years, I'm still  surviving, thank God.
Through all those miserable life I  had, it doesn't topple me. I had this, as they say, the GUTS in me.
I'm not bragging or trying to be some smart-ass telling  about his life-achievements.  No I'm NOT.
I had what it takes to be a survivor. To survive many hardships and miseries in life was not easy. Many trials and tribulations I had encountered I faced them with dignity and spirit to survive in this harsh world.
But at first, I also had these low-down feelings. Who doesn't.
As time goes by, after so many kinds of disasters in my life, I realized that I had to overcome all these or I'll be damned forever.
My younger days were full of gloom and sadness.  I was alone then.  With no one to turn to and no friends to talk to. In fact, no shoulder to cry on. I became silent, reserved and of course alone.
My teenage years were more worst. My love-life was a despair.  Every girl that I was trying to woo, became the she-devils . To me they were all the same. They looked at me as someone strange, nerdy, stupid and not to be loved.
My adult world was no difference. Friends became bitter enemies. Relatives became a battlefield for me. I then moved on. I try to forget everything that had happened. I was alone as usual.
All these things that happened had taught me many things. I felt that to survive in this world I had to be strong. I can't lose to anything. Not even one bit.
I'm no coward. I'm a hero to myself. I've got to win for myself. I had to or otherwise that's it for me.
Many people don't trust me and I don't trust them also. You can't trust anyone easily. If you trust them too much, in the end they'll find your weak-points and kill you with that.
I tried to be friendly sometimes. I try to smile. But many people thought I was crazy smiling ears to ears with everyone I met. In the end that smile was no more because no one smiled back.
I tried talking to people but sometimes the talks turned to bullshits. With many bullshit individuals around, you became another bullshit just like them.
My face looked serious and stern. They don't like that face I know. But I had to because if I became too sweety, the respects were gone. I had to have some respect at least. In order to gain that respect, I gained less friends. No doubt about it.
Working life for me is another burden. Throughout my years I had become a slave to stupid bosses and silly people. These people thought they were more intelligent than you, but to me the office-cleaners were more brilliant. At least they had more ideas to show rather than being bossy but understand nothing.
Hey..I'm not complaining. I'm just telling something from my breast. It became easy after that you know. And I'm not trying to gain sympathy or something.
Honestly, I learned many lessons about life. I learned a lot of things negatively and positively. It's good  because I became more matured and more motivated to move on in life. It doesn't weakened me as I said earlier.
But sadly...I'm still alone.